Pacman Speaks Out

Via The Onion

"I just want people to know that I'm not going to be present at Shaker's, the club where possibly about to be deceased chump-ass bartender Darrent Wilson has been known to exchange harsh language and threats with my known associates, including kicking me and my people out of his establishment," said Jones, who is also currently being questioned by police concerning a recent shooting at an Atlanta strip club and is currently on suspension from the NFL following a melee and shooting in February at a Las Vegas strip club. "I am sorry for what is about to happen to this man, who will be in the wrong place at the wrong time, but it will have had nothing to do with me."

The funniest part about this is that I really could see Pacman issuing a statement that reads pretty similiar to the one the Onion put out.