No one will be emBARASSed at the UEFA Cup Final

Whenever one of the great European Sporting Events rolls around (such as tomorrow's UEFA CUP Final), I tingle with anticipation. It's usually not because I expect to be wowed by the competition on the field. It's because of Mark Roberts. But, unfortunately, the chances of Mark making an appearance in Glasglow are slim to none.

A serial streaker famous for targeting major sporting events has been slapped with a three-year football ban designed to stop him from baring all at the Uefa Cup final.

This terrible news was brought to my attention by the premier futbol blog out there, The Offside.

Roberts' list of streaks includes some of the most prestigious events across the pond; the 2006 Ryder Cup, the 2006 Winter Olympics, the 2003 Running of the Bulls, the 2003 French Open Final, the 2002 Champions League Final, and the 1999 British Open, just to name a few. But perhaps his most famous jaunt was during Super Bowl XXXVIII, when he made international headlines.

And the 42-year-old has vowed to fight the banning order.

It stops him from entering every football ground in the UK and requires him to hand in his passport and register with the police whenever British teams play in Europe.

It's encouraging to see that the ban only applies to "whenever British teams play in Europe", which means that the chances of seeing Roberts' bum at an event in the near future is a good possibility.

All the man wants to do is show his Willy to the World (The Offside)